ABUSED. Chapter 19.

The weekend couldn’t go by fast enough. I was jumpy almost the entire time not because I felt guilty but I was scared to let my intentions slip. I wasn’t sure of what would happen but I imagined being beat up so bad I would never be able to walk again or being tied to the foot of the bed for a month. You can’t blame me for being so dramatic. I was scared of never being able to break free. By Monday morning, I was a nervous wreck and that was one thing I couldn’t hide.

“Baby, are you okay?” Kayode asked with concern. “You don’t look so good.”

“I’m fine,” I mumbled. “I didn’t sleep so well and besides, I’m thinking of the stress I have to undergo at work this week,” I faked a smile. “I have so many deadlines I must meet up with.”

Kayode moved close and kissed my forehead. “Just keep your chin up. I’m sure everything will be okay. I’ll see you tonight.”

I grinned with what I hoped was a loving look and nodded, fully intending for him to find an empty house when he returned. He normally leaves before me, so as soon as he left the door, I sprang into action and stuffed a bag full of clothes and necessities I would need for the next few days or maybe weeks. My heart was pounding in my chest the whole time, somehow I felt guilty, scared and exhilarated at the same time. This was it- I finally had enough.

After I packed my bag, I called my boss at work that I was purging and made exaggerated painful voices over the phone to pass my point across. I was happy when my boss, for the first time since I started working for him granted me a leave for the day but made me promise to make up for it the next day. Then I called Damola and told him about my plan to leave the house in a few minutes.

“Wow! That’s a huge step,” he said excitedly. “Where are you moving to?”

I sighed heavily. “I don’t even have an idea. I don’t exactly have friends around and even the few I had in Lagos, I already severed my ties with them. I have a close friend at work but I don’t want her to be aware that anything is happening.”

He was silent for what felt like an hour when it was in fact just five seconds. Then he sighed heavily over the phone too and I knew he was about to suggest something he knew I would never agree with. “You can put your pride aside and go back to your uncle’s place, you know?” he said uncertainly but as I was about to call his bullshit, I knew he was right. I didn’t have anywhere else to go.

One more look around with tears in my eyes, I remembered how happy I was the day I moved in, the future for the taking. How could things have gone so much worse in less than 6 months?

I told him I would call him when I settle down and tell him how it goes with my uncle. The ride over to my uncle’s place was the most humiliating over. I got a taxi so I would be able to think and reflect on what the next step in my life would be like but halfway to the house, I realised I couldn’t do it alone. I told the cab driver to make a turn around and I called Damola that I was coming to the hospital first.

 As promised, Damola was waiting for me in front of the hospital. He looked so handsome though I didn’t have any feelings for him, he was just the best friend I had at the moment- the only one I trusted and I hoped I wasn’t making a mistake. He paid the taxi driver and carried my bag.

“I’m so sorry for taking you away from work. I really don’t know what I would do without you. I’m really unhappy and I can’t do this alone.”

He stopped in his track and looked at me with a piercing gaze. “You don’t have to thank me. I’m just doing my duty as a good friend and as a medical doctor who saw a threat to life and would do anything to avoid it. Now, let’s call your uncle and beg him. You can’t just go there and expect him to act like he’s cool with all you did.”

The fear and uncertainty of what my uncle would say was disconcerting. I called him with my phone four times and he didn’t answer his calls. The feeling of being stuck increased and how much I messed up finally dawned on me.  

“Calm down,” Damola told me after we entered his office. “Give me his number and let me talk to him. You have his wife’s number, right?” I nodded affirmatively. “Call her and let her know that you’re coming back home.”

I remembered her disappointed look the day I leftand then remembered how supportive she was. I picked up my phone and dialled her number.

“Aunty Jummy! Iya oko mi,” she said over the phone and I didn’t realise how much I missed her until I heard her voice over the phone.

“Ekaasan ma.”

“Haaa, you just left like that and didn’t even look back. Ko daa o,” she said after returning my greeting. I was tongue tied about asking her if I could come back into the house but at the end of the day, my lack of choice made me cave and I found myself doing what I didn’t think I would do in a million years.

“Aunty Mariam, I want to come back home.” I could barely keep the thick emotions from my voice.

She was very silent for a few minutes before she answered. “He didn’t stop beating you abi? I’m very glad that you changed your mind. Ile nilee yin. I or my husband would have called you but you know how stubborn he is when he makes up his mind about things.  Igbawo le ma wa?”

“How about right now? I took space from work.”

She told me that she was at home and I finally believed that there was hope after all. When I dropped the call, Damola was all smiles. Till today, I don’t know what he told my uncle but he said it was safe to finally go home.

My room was still the same. The only difference was the dust that covered the whole space. Aunty Mariam didn’t ask me anything, one glance at me and I knew she was giving me a silent assurance that she understood me and that I could always come to her.

“Oya unpack and relax, I’ll go into the kitchen and prepare food and then you can tell me about that fine bobo that drove you here.” She winked and we both burst out laughing.

I filled the empty space with my belongings and hanged my clothes like I used to. I didn’t even bother with categorisation that Kayode shoved onto me, I missed being messy and comfortable with myself. Before I finished cleaning up, my stomach was already growling and i attacked the semo and okro soup my uncle’s wife prepared. I started to relax fully, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I called Damola to thank him for everything and he seemed very relieved and happy to help.

“I’m so glad to help. Call me if you need anything or anyone to talk to. I promise to always be here- one call away” he sang the laugh part with a poor imitation of Sam Smith’s voice and I chuckled.

He had a way of making me forget my worries. “Thanks for everything. I will never be able to repay you for everything you’ve done for me.”

There was a brief silence. “Staying away from Kayode will be repayment enough.” There was something in his voice that threw mw off, like he didn’t trust me enough to follow through with emancipating myself from Kayode. Back then, I was certain that the worst was over. I had made the first step and I was sure that the rest would follow through. There was no doubt at all in my mind that I had left Kayode for good even though I still loved him.

“Now let’s talk about your safety plan.” He said with a sigh.

“Errrm, I actually don’t know what that is.”

The line became dead and in a way, it made me feel scared about the seriousness of what was to come. “First, he will try to contact you.  He will call you, send text, threaten and then beg to manipulate you again. Do not pick up; you understand me? Don’t talk to him. Then secondly, he knows where you work and knows that the most likely place you’d be is your uncle’s place. You should map out a plan for that- prepare a speech of what you’re going to tell him in your mind when that happens. Try not to meet alone with him and if you must, do it in a public place. I also suggest that you explain what happened to your boos at work and your uncle so that they will alert the police or local security people if he tries to confront you.”

There was no way I would talk to my uncle or boss about what happened. My uncle would hunt down Kayode and kill him and my boss would probably think I sound ridiculous and turn it all into a huge joke. I however reassured him that I would and thanked him again before ending the call.

I lazed around the house, and when my uncle came back at 7pm, he didn’t show any surprise at seeing me. He didn’t ask for any explanations, even after I begged him and expressed deep regrets at my actions. He took me back with open arms. He was a man who had never really shown a high level of compassion but this was different and I felt it.

I was just returning back to my room when Kayode called. I remembered Damola’s warnings but you know what they said about curiosity and the cat.

“Where the fuck are you?” he barked into the phone, clearly in a foul mood. Yet, I wasn’t ready for the emotional manipulation that would come with telling him about my plans to leave him.

“I’m still at work. We have a meeting today.”

“Hurry up jare, I’m starving.” He didn’t know that he would soon get used to cooking his own food by himself.