ABUSED. Chapter 7

Ask me today that what made me stay with him, I'm not even sure of what my response would be. It was very obvious that we loved each other and our 3 weeks separation was enough to erase all doubts. He begged me profusely and convinced me that it wasn't me daring him that made him control himself but it was about him not letting his dark side take over again. That was what motivated me to continue, firmly believing that I could fix him. I didn't even realize at the time that it would require seeking serious professional help. I was just convinced that if I loved him enough and helped him get through this, he would eventually become the man I wanted him to be.

I somehow felt sorry for him when I thought of how angry he must have been at himself everytime after he hit me. He had been unable to control himself and maybe it was my fault for provoking him with my outburst and the things he didn't like.

Over the next two weeks, there was calmness. I tried had to show my support t everything he did and not make him angry. He was very patient with me and even made efforts to tell me the things that could spark him up. I spent the weekends with him and we fell right back into our routine. We didn't have sex because I was on my period and according to him, it was a constant state of dirtiness. He however showed me different ways of pleasing him, some so revolting that I almost vomited. Asides kissing, I wasn't touched.


At the end of August, Kayode surprised me with a weekend getaway for the celebration of our first anniversary. I felt like a princess with the treatment I got and he was back to his charming self, fulfilling all my wishes and proclaiming his love for me. Everytime I thanked him for something, he would say

"For what? It's not a crime to satisfy a girl I adore more than life itself." His words made every bitterness I had in my heart evaporate into thin air. On  Saturday night, we went to a restaurant and chatted away, forgetting for just one night all the problems we faced. We took a walk hand in hand, goofed around and played with the pillows in our room, him tickling me insanely with me laughing like I had no worries. . No one would have suspected that we were anything but happy.


On Sunday, I told him I wanted to get my hair-do changed at one of the salons at the resort and he agreed to follow me there. I had planned on making bouncy curly weavon as it brings out my face but he didn't even ask for my opinion when we got there.

"She wants something short; very short with a black weavon," he told the woman. "Skull something or what do you call it?"

"But she has a small head and the style might not even suit her face," the stylist pushed back.

"Well, that's what I want," he said with a finality that made the woman look at me questionily but I couldn't protest it.

My hairstyle met his approval two hours later even though I looked terrible. He told me I looked very beautiful and I nodded in silence. By the time we went got back to our room, we were very tired and since we didn't plan to leave till very early the following  morning, we just had a shower together and climbed into bed. That night, I knew our abstinence was over. Things were heating up as we clung to  each other; my breath already quickened in anticipation of what was to come. He looked at me with a warmth and love that it took my breath away as he entered me.

"You're so beautiful," he said longingly as his fingers traced shapes on my belly while I gave him an affectionate smile. "You're mine forever and no one will touch you except me."

That was when I notice that his eyes had darkened and I could see the raw possessive glint in his eyes, melting my affectionate smile and getting it replaced with a barely concealed scared one.


"If you ever let anyone but me touch you, I can kill you slowly, cut you piece by piece like they do in horror movies while you're still alive," His eyes lacked the warmth I saw earlier but burned with last,  sadism and violence. I had no doubt that he was serious. "Do you understand?"


All I could do was nod, totally rigid and afraid to move or make a sound. My mouth was dry and blood rushed into my ears. Then he started to move, this time demanding, brutal and unloving. It was strictly to bring him pleasure and me pain. When he saw the pain etched on my face, he gripped my hair tightly, drawing my scalp together until he found his release and rolled away from me.

"Go to sleep," he ordered as he pulled me over to him and held me tightly. I stared into the darkness of the night, careful not to let him hear my silent cries. I was terrified and that was the first time I realized that I could never leave him even if I tried.